Did you know Goose had a name?

In this time of incredible death and disaster it is easy for humankind to get wrapped up in all that is a threat to modern man. As cities crumble, lives are lost, and the future as is right now appears most bleak, it is important that we not watch these end of days in a self absorbed shell.

We are but one creature on this earth, and today I think its important, however grey and dark your afternoon may be, that there are creatures whose days are being spent much more confused, much more worried, much more embedded with feathers.

Today is 'think of the damn geese' day; why you ask, well of all creatures living today, I think the goose is in most trouble. Think of how shitty it is to be a goose right now. You are a creature whose life revolves around the seasonal migration between the North and the South. To capture the moment, I feel as though I should create a dialogue between two geese. The first shall be named Anthony and the second Edward in memory of the greatest goose of all time; he who flew with Maverick. Before I begin, Slider you should know that you stink!

Anthony: Damn Ed, sure is getting cold up here again.
Edward: No shit Tony, it seems like only a few weeks ago we finally had the balls to make the trip back up here.
Anthony: It was only a few weeks ago, and we wernt even the last. I remember seeing Anne and her fam from Brockville crusing by in late June; and I thought late May was late.
Edward: That damned Anne just loves soaking up as much Cali sun as she can eh?
Anthony: For real!

Anthony: Ok, so should we get ready to fly south again for the winter?
Edward: Fuk no, have you seen the news lately, like hell I wanna fly into those kinda winds, and rain.
Anthony: Hurricanes are lame
Edward: very lame

Anthony: Alright so should we stay up here for a while until the hurricane season passes by?
Edward: Fuk no, its so cold my nipples look like my beak.
Anthony: haha they do, what would happen if I flicked em
Edward: Ouch!!! Ass
Anthony: Stop whinning crowface. So where the hell should we go. Wanna try East for a change
Edward: Fuk no, like hell I wanna catch the damn flu.
Anthony: Geez man we're screwed. Those damn humans slowly pillage away the entire planet, and were the ones who have to deal with a friggin plague in the form of the common cold.

Edward: Fuk it, Im just gonna fly around in circles until my ass gets duck hunted by that guy in the orange hat down there.
Anthony: True, later Ed.
Edward: Later Tony.

So the moral of this story is that while the world crumbles remember how cool of a movie top gun was. Tom Cruise kind of looks like a goose no? A scientology loving winged beast of beauty he is.

Kelly McGillis is hawt shit.Goose's non army name was actually, Nick Bradshaw. who knew.!

posted by mr. tomas ubik @ Monday, October 24, 2005