mind yo' skunky ass breath

The valued opinion of the local beer store worker is often a welcomed yet unfamiliar occurence. After all, there are a lot of unknown beers on the wall of cheap, featured sparatacally throughout the glass wall of sauces at the best thing to ever come out of Canadian government, and a little advice from their trusty employees is incredibly moving when wantign to experiment with another case available for only $24.

This story happened last weekend, but as the tales from this weekend are far too incriminating for a true name blog, I will divert back seven days ago.

So a tall german friend and myself are trying to decide what tar like beer we will engage in on our convocation bender written about oh too frequently earlier this week. Through the styles of Lucky, Carling, Faxe, and Laker, we find ourselves fixed on the muscle bound trademark of Steelback Beer. A true Canadian beer, it says, why were Canadian. 5.5 % it says, why we like above average alcohol levels. A silver label with muscles on it, why were dreamy muscly (*cough*slightlie*cough*) individuals. Lets do the steelback.

The conversation at the teller went as follows:

yours truly: One case of steelback please.
cute ashley worker: what kind?
Y.T: well the musclely one of course!
C.A.W: you sure.
Y.T: why of course, but wait why do you ask?
C.A.W: have you ever tried it before?
Y.T: no cute ashley, we havn't, but were canadian, enjoy strong beer, and have lots of muscles

C.A.W: well normally I dont say anything, but I would pick something different. See we've had that beer for ever, and just last week a couple cases passed their expirary and I had to pour them out and I swear it smelt like skunk vomit poured over hot ass chowder.

Y.T: Hahahaha
German Aaron: really, so we shouldn't get it?
C.A.W: I wouldnt.
Y.T: Fine, case of Lucky then. Hey wanna come drink some with us?
C.A.W: no, but your the sexiest man I have ever seen and I will come over later for a sexy party.
Y.T: holla at yo' boy!

So needless to say, if ever faced with the opportunity to buy Steelback, I would encourage you to choose a new brand, for if ever to take the words from a cute Ashley, I personally think avoiding that which tastes like "skunk puke over hot ass chowder" is one of the finest recommendations I have ever heard.


*please note* that two of the lines in the above conversation were untrue but I'll never tel lyou which two.

posted by mr. tomas ubik @ Monday, June 20, 2005