midget beatings are scary

Anyone who knows me, knows that I'm not scared of very much. Sure a knife held to my face, overly happy clowns, a group of midgets looking for a fight; all warrant a little fear from time to time, but I mean the biggie's like death, failure, love, they never really get to me.

Last night I had a dream that I had been in a coma for seven years and had woken up at the age of 30 not realizing what had surpassed for the last near decade of my life. I can honestly say that this gave me a legitimate fear to ponder about. In the dream I was a wreck, not believing that seven years of my life had passed by sleeping while the rest of the world lived away the days.

Sure this conjurs up Freudian analysis of me thinking I'm not doing enough, or that I'm missing something important, or that I simply sleep away too many weekends, but beyond that the genuine fear of falling in a coma has me all nimbly wimbly....which is bad I think.

Now I work in a hospital every day, so the sight of pain and suffering and sadness is slowly becoming normal as I pass through the waiting room to get my morning cup of java, and so maybe thats where these images of hospital care and worry are surfacing from in my subconcious but never the less; a coma is fucking scary.

I woke up and no one was around, not my family, not many friends (Cid was there so at least we know she won't have much to do when she's 30) but everyone else was no where. Now I'm not going to blame you guys for not showing up to my dream induced coma awakening, because after all I would never expect you to. I mean when you found out I was awake you better show up, but in 7 years everyone will have a family, maybe kids, live all over the place and be doing the life thing.

My fear comes from the fact that I would of lost out on that time to do all those things, and before last night, I never really realized how much I value the opportunity to do whatever the hell I want now that I'm done school and really living on my own accord.

So, I guess for the next seven years I'm going to wear a hard hat, walk gingerly wherever I go, and never ever piss off any group of five or more midgets in fear of a beating that no man could live down.

*I also fear eggplant, it just doesnt sound right.

posted by mr. tomas ubik @ Wednesday, May 25, 2005